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Showing posts with label rituals. Show all posts
Showing posts with label rituals. Show all posts

Wednesday, March 19, 2014

Rules, Rituals, and Some Kinky Stuff -- Answers to Questions from Mc kitten



So mc kitten asked about the rules/rituals that Daddy’s instigated that I don’t like and what ones I do like. I have 67 rules at the moment and a handful of rituals, and after re-reading them this morning there honestly are not that many I don’t like. Or maybe I’m just feeling that way because a lot of them have been suspended over the past few months…I don’t know. But anyways, here I go…


Rules/Rituals I Don’t Like:


  • There’s a rule that I’m not allowed to use the word “hate” in front of him. There’s no reason for this rule (except that he likes it and thinks it’s funny) so I think that’s why it frustrates me and I hate strongly dislike it. That and I forget it a lot.
  • I’m not allowed to swear outside the bedroom. I’ve never been one to frequently use swear words so it’s not a huge deal, but there are times in life that just call for a really strong word. I am, however, allowed to swear in the bedroom provided it’s in a sexual context. For example, saying “I want to fuck you,” is acceptable. Calling him a “motherfucker” apparently is not.
  • That I’m not allowed to cut my hair without permission. Daddy likes long hair. I sort of prefer it on the easy-to-take-care-of-short-side. I guess I get to use to long hair now.
  • The 5 minute call/text back rule. If Daddy calls or texts me, he expects a response within five minutes unless I have a good reason (such as driving, in church, at a movie, etc). I have a bad habit of both turning my phone off, losing my phone, and forgetting to charge it. I’ve gotten in big trouble over breaking this rule before.
  • The no asking for orgasms rule. I’m allowed (and actually supposed) to tell him if I feel I physically need one. But asking or begging for one during sex (unless he tells me to) is forbidden and sometimes well when we’re in the heat of the moment and all…I forget and ask anyways.
  • There’s also a “No Expectations” rules which can give me a headache if I think too much about it. It would take me a month’s worth of blog posts to explain the circles it sometimes sends me in, but I'll try to keep this short. Basically I’m supposed to trust Daddy to guide me, love me, and take care of my needs. However, I’m not supposed to place ‘expectations’ on him. For example, early on I told Daddy I needed more domination from him to feel submissive. Daddy felt my problem wasn't that he wasn't giving me enough domination, but rather I was focusing too much on what was missing rather than what was there. So he gave me an assignment where I spent the week listing every time I felt his domination. In the end when I saw how long that list was, I realized he was right and felt much better. So telling him I need more domination and asking is okay. Trusting him to fulfill my needs is okay. Expecting him to give me what I ask for all the time is not okay because as in this case, he fulfilled my needs without giving me what I asked for. It is a good rule for us -- it just makes my head hurt sometimes.
  • As for the rituals – well there aren’t really any I don’t like. Sometimes getting up at 5 am for the morning ritual and to make him breakfast sucks (because I’m not really a morning person), but the rituals to me are all about focusing on why I do this and why I need this. So they are a huge help to me and I do love them.


Rules/Rituals I do Like:


  • There’s a rule that my job as mother always comes first. My father made my mother choose between him and the kids in a terrible way, and I’ve told Daddy in the past that I would choose my children if forced to in a situation like that. I’m glad that Daddy made it clear that he won’t ever make me make such a choice.
  • There’s a rule that I have to go to church every week. I like this rule not so much for the rule, but because what it stands for. Daddy is not a religious person. In fact, he hates strongly dislikes most churches and religions. However, I grew up to have a rather strong faith, and Daddy respects that. He made this rule on his own (I never asked for it) and to me it sort of says that he’s not out to change me, just keep me safe and bring out the best in me.
  • As for my favorite rituals – well I really love them all. But I think my favorite is the only one we’ve really gotten to do over the past few months (and what I’m really missing this week). It’s our one and only DD/lg one, but Daddy puts me to bed and tucks me in every night. I really miss him.


Mc kitten also asked: I'd like to know what you favourite new thing has been that you both have tried since starting on this TTWD road and what is the thing at the list of what you'd like to try next!

Well my favorite is the orgasm tease & denial. As much as I sometimes hate strongly dislike it, nothing pushes me faster into that subspace place than when he plays or rather tortures me. Daddy’s is the cane. We have a flogger, a crop, a paddle, a belt, a wooden spoon, and his hand, but Daddy always prefers to spank with his ‘stick’ (which up until recently was a blind tilt). Just before I got all my health issues, he got a cane and really loved the welts it made.

As for what we’d like to try next…Daddy just wants to get back in the ‘swing of things’. So he really wouldn’t say what he wants to try next. I’d like to be fisted or have my nipples pierced, I think. Or maybe not.

Thanks for the questions mc kitten!